Why I Love Being A Mom
“Mother’s love is peace. It need not be acquired, it need not be deserved.” – Erich Fromm
Having had a rather complicated and distant relationship with my mother, I’ll be honest, for a long time, motherhood wasn’t the first thing on my mind. In fact, I was afraid of having children of my own and hardly thought that motherhood would come easily to me. Surprisingly enough, somewhere hidden beneath my thick skin, I’m actually quite an emotional person and I’ve discovered that that my first born child has brought an immense, indescribable joy to my life. Today, my son is going on 3 years old, and thanks to the experience he’s brought me, I can now list several reasons why being a mom - albeit life changing - is extraordinary. You’ve heard it before, we all have, but kids have a knack of making the expression all that much more true: Time flies. I catch myself thinking over his first few years, which have been so intense and special. I wish there was a way to remember it all, because there isn’t a second I’d like to forget.
Bringing a child into this world is by far much more than “just giving birth.” Be it a natural birth or a c-section, a great sense of fulfilment and empowerment take over you the second you hold your baby for the first time. Both pregnancy and raising such a tiny human have made me into a better person by encouraging me, day by day, to grow and mature for someone else other than myself. The realization of actually having him proved that I could do great things, and even more so, gave me strength to actually go out there and take charge. For a reason I can’t explain, once your life isn’t just about you anymore, you suddenly have more purpose, more reason, more motivation to pursue a purpose in life than ever before.
2. Strong & Unconditional Love
Like many, I thought I knew what love was before having a child. I mean, I have a husband, I have wonderful, caring friends and I have a family. I am loved, and I love others. What I will say is that I knew the feeling of love. Little did I know how strong that feeling could become with a child. Nothing compares to a mother's love for her children and I truly understand that now. This feeling of unconditional, honest and pure love is overwhelmingly strong and notably so within the child’s first year due to the endless fears parents have to face.
3. Motherhood Reinforces a Couple’s Love
There are no words to describe what happens to a couple when meeting their child for the very first time. Becoming parents is a unique, one of a kind, mesmerizing experience. An existing bond can be reinforced and tightened when having a baby because of how special that child is to each individual parent. A baby is, of course, a product of both its parents, but it’s amazing to see how the child resembles each of its parents. At the baby’s very first cry at birth, a simple husband-wife relationship suddenly multiplies into several dynamics: husband-wife, parents-child, father-child, mother-child. Growing, changing, adapting and learning these new dynamics as a team, as a family, creates an undeniably deep connection.
4. Reliving Childhood
No matter what kind of childhood you had, raising your own little one is bound to bring up memories. And listen, those memories can be good, too! Playing with similar toys, singing a few of the same nursery rhymes or playing certain games can remind you of the good things you enjoyed when you were young. Even more importantly, children learn through play and therefore, taking advantage of these playful, amusing moments is actually advantageous in more ways than one. Furthermore, certain traditions are passed down from generation to generation and getting to incorporate them with your own children is an experience in and of itself.
5. First Anything
First sounds, words, foods, teeth, steps, etc. Every first is all-so-special and smile-worthy. Watching and helping your child grow and develop into a little person is not only the overall objective of parenthood, but it is an impossibly rewarding and yet challenging task all at once. Every single accomplishment exudes amazement and yet, learning and teaching doesn’t go without effort. Every step of the way, year after year, is meaningful and brings a parent a sense of pride. I honestly love to see my baby grow, as well as to witness the wonder in his eyes when he plays, imagines, or discovers new things.
6. Wanting Space but Missing your Child
Let’s face it: Every parent needs a break and a little space from time to time. It’s not only important for the individual, but it’s equally important for the couple. The first year is generally the toughest because your baby is very dependent however, as your child grows, taking longer breaks actually becomes a possibility. That said, just because it’s possible, it doesn’t mean you won’t find yourself thinking about your kid the entire time you’re away! Having a little time off is great, but you’ll always think about your child or worry about how they’re doing. Like many moms I presume, I’ve had quite some difficulties trusting another caregiver with my child which always has me rushing back to my son as soon as I possibly can. In time, and with practice, I imagine I’ll get a little better at being away from him, relaxing and enjoying my time.
7. Being Called "Mommy"
This is one of my all-time favorites! I absolutely love hearing my son's voice when he calls me "Mamma" or "Mommy"! I’ll honestly never, ever get tired of hearing him say it, in spite of him saying it a good 100 times a day right now. It’s like music to my ears. The best part about it all is that my son entices me by using different tones, too. Whether he needs something, wants something, is asking a question, or just wants to express himself, he has a different way of calling my name. It's just so cute. Overall, I love and cherish the feeling of being his everything right now, the center of his world and that naturally, he turns to me for anything.
8. Love in all it's Shapes & Forms
Last but not least, the very best thing about being a mom to me is not just how much love I give, but how much love I receive from my child. His cuddles, his kisses, his little "I wove you”, his smiles… And the list is endless. The way he looks at me, the way he can fall asleep with his head on my chest, or lay down next to me and stare at me in the eyes, with complicity, and as if no one else existed in the whole entire world. I am his world and he is mine and that’s what makes our bond so special. He climbs on me to play or when I'm exercising, he pulls at my legs and arms and hair for attention when I'm busy, smacks me on the butt when I'm in the kitchen (not cooking fast enough), comes to see what I'm doing in the bathroom all by myself, or just claims a hug anywhere and at any time and for whatever reason because that too, is love at its finest. There’s no better feeling than being loved by your child.
Sarah The Digital GypSea
United Kingdom, May 2020